Life After Senshihood
by Suffering Angel
Summary: UPDATED! Crystal Tokyo is a reality. All the Senshi live in the palace together. But Sailor Mars can't take it. She wants out. What will she do? Will she be able to run away from the thing she has dedicated her life for? Contains some ShoujoAi
1. Dawn

I do not owe Sailor Moon.  
  
A/N: This will be a kind of mix between the Manga, Anime and NA version. I'm gonna mix a lot of things, so you might consider this a slight AU. Nothing much. Enjoy ! ^_^  
  
Sailor Mars's POV. "Blah"- means talk- 'blah'- means thought. Usually Mars', since she's telling the story, so further in depth of Rei's opinion on the whole thing ^^ enjoy!  
  
Life after Senshi-hood.  
  
Dawn.  
  
I looked outside the window at the city of Tokyo. Crystal Tokyo. The palace was stuck in the middle of a modern city, covering most of it with its shadow. Nonetheless, the people were grateful for the honor of having the Queen of the world, Neo-Queen Serenity, in their city.  
  
Silly fools. She was here for all of her life. Why shouldn't she build her palace here?  
  
I sighed as another beautiful sunset colored the sky with red and orange. And red. I love sunsets. It was the time the sky reflected me the most. Orange and Red, the way I am. And then came the night, blue and black. The way I feel.  
  
  
  
Why am I feeling like this? None of the other senshi seems to be upset. What is it that I have to lose more than the others?  
  
"Mars? It's time."  
  
I nodded and follow the maid into a room. Or should I call it, a hall. All the senshi, with the exception of the Moon sailors, were in what became known as 'The memory Room'. Someplace where we kept everything we could from before the planet's rebirth. Ami, pardon, Sailor Mercury, kept putting her science books in order. Heaven forbids they should fall out of place. Mako... SAILOR JUPITER was cleaning her old set of kitchen knives.  
  
"Still the best that could be found"  
  
She tells us. I agree, nothing made from crystal could cut like those Ginzu knives. Damn, girl can cook!  
  
SAILOR VENUS was looking at herself in the huge mirror her mother left her. On the table next to it were a few bunny rag-dolls and pictures of her family and friends.  
  
I looked at the Outers' part of the room. We all had large space to put our things in, and Haruka... SAILOR URANUS found it appropriate to place her old car there. You have no idea how many collectors wanted to buy that old car from her. But she'd never give up on her baby.  
  
In SAILOR NEPTUNE's part, there was much more room due to the lack of a car. So Neptune put in Uranus' old piano. It served a lot of purposes. It was a table for Neptune to put everything she wanted on it, and gave Uranus some free space. And once in a while, the two would play a duet. Neptune still has that violin of hers.  
  
Saturn's corner is the most colorful. All sorts of dolls and toys and games. And pictures.  
  
Pluto's corner is by far the most... UNIQUE. She has her old fashion designs, some clothes she actually made, and other stuff. But the things that make it the most interesting is a little garnet box she keeps. She claims she has things from the Silver Millennium in there. I believe her. Why should she lie?  
  
  
  
And then I look at MY corner of the room. A mirror that rivals Venus's in size and tops it in quality. Several make-up products, but that's only because I like this mirror over the one I have in my room.  
  
I run my finger gently over my mother's necklace. The only thing I have of her, other than the memory. And that's all that I need. Other than the pictures.  
  
I think I have the largest collection of pictures in the room. Pictures of all of us when it was just the Inner senshi, and then more with the Outers. It hurts me to see that in all of the pictures we are in Sailor Fuku. Serenity says that it's for our own good. If anyone should get hold of those pictures, he could do something.  
  
I laughed in her face. As if knowing our identities would help NOW. I can't remember the last time I was ME. And it hurts.  
  
"Girls? Gather around?"  
  
We all turn our looks to The Queen. She is smiling. Her warm smile, the smile that belongs to my Usa-Chan all those years back. I smile back, hoping its good news. I sure could use it.  
  
"I have a gift for you, my friends. I thought about what I could donate to this room. After all, I was there too, you know."  
  
We laugh. Actually, I hardly giggle. I just don't feel like it.  
  
"So here. A fitting picture for 'The memory room'."  
  
She shows us the picture she was holding, and my heart shatter. As the other Senshi cheer and congratulate Neo-Queen Serenity, I realized the truth. The hard, cold truth.  
  
  
  
She puts the picture on a little podium in the middle of the room. After the Queen left and the other Senshi went about their business, leaving their memories behind, I stay alone and look at the picture.  
  
"Hey."  
  
A little word and a hand on the shoulder could be just a friendly act, but not to one such as me.  
  
"What do you want, Venus?"  
  
I can see she is a bit hurt. I didn't mean to, it's just the way I am these day.  
  
"I was worried about you. We said we'd go for a walk in the gardens, have our girl-chat."  
  
"What about, Venus? About the weather? About the current state? Here's an idea, what about THE LATEST BOY BAND?!"  
  
Shock is what that covered her face next. I turn away with anger.  
  
"Look at what she gave us. Such a simple gift... And such a deep, complicated meaning. Look at it, SAILOR VENUS..." I put as much venom into those last two words as I could. It worked, by the look on his face.  
  
"...Look at it, and tell me what you see."  
  
"Well, I..."  
  
She took a step forward, to gain a bit of her self confidence. I am NOT impressed.  
  
"I see all of the senshi, Star Lights included, with Endymion, out of our fukus. Why?"  
  
She looks at me and I know she missed the point.  
  
"That's the point, VENUS. Those aren't the Star Lights. And that's not Endymion. And those aren't the senshi."  
  
It's obvious that my point is beyond her.  
  
"No. Those are Yaten-Kun, Seiya-Kun and Taiki-Kun. That's Mamoru-Kun."  
  
Her eyes open slightly. I wonder if she's starting to follow.  
  
"That's Usa-Chan, Ami-Chan, Mina-Chan, Mako-Chan, Haruka-Chan, Michi-Chan, Hotaru-Chan and Setsuna-Chan. And lastly, Rei-Chan."  
  
She looks at me as if I'm insane.  
  
"Never mind."  
  
I walk out of the room, leaving her confused. Without a moment's hesitation, I enter the throne room. The guards are caught a bit off guard, but let me in. After all, I'm SAILOR MARS, right?!  
  
"Mars! What a nice surprise!"  
  
Endymion welcomes me. Serenity isn't there. I kneel before him as is my duty to my king.  
  
"Rise. You know you can cut that show around me."  
  
I stand, yet keep my eyes on the ground. Why couldn't you be here, Usa- Chan? Everything would've been so much easier.  
  
"Well, Sailor Mars? What can I do for you?"  
  
It takes a few more second for me to get the courage needed for speech.  
  
"Your highness, may I be excused?"  
  
"But you just got in..."  
  
"Excused for the day."  
  
He looks at me with confused silence. I can see he is thinking hard about it. Then his face lights up as the door behind us opens. Saved by the Queen.  
  
"...And then I want the head priest to meet me. Those protests have gone WAY too far and..."  
  
She stops as she notices me and Endymion's confused face.  
  
"Leave us."  
  
The servant bows and closes the door behind her.  
  
"Mars, what a nice surprise! I haven't seen you in this room for far too long! Why, I was beginning to think you were avoiding me or something and..."  
  
"She wants to be excused."  
  
"Pardon, Endymion?"  
  
"I want to be excused for the rest of the day, your highness."  
  
She turns her gaze immediately at me, and I stare so hard on the floor I could burn a hole through it, even without my fire powers. If she gets mad, I'm toast. If she allows it, then... Well, I'm toast. There's just no way...  
  
"All right."  
  
I stare at her now.  
  
"You may go. But I want you back before night falls."  
  
"What if I'm late?"  
  
I know I'm pushing my luck. I just feel... All or nothing. And by her look, it's nothing.  
  
"Midnight. Latest as it gets. Be inside the main gates by midnight."  
  
I'm left speechless for one of the few times in my life. Then I hug her and run out the room.  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
"What do you think she is up to?"  
  
Endymion asked.  
  
"I do not know. It is most unlikely for her to do such a thing... Perhaps..."  
  
"Perhaps...?"  
  
"Nothing." 'Perhaps I have kept them locked for too long?'  
  
"Never mind. What's on today's schedule?"  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
I run through the castle, almost knocking down Neptune and Uranus, and actually knocking down Mercury.  
  
"MARS, LOOK WHERE YOU'RE RUNNING!"  
  
I ran to my room and looked through my closet. Everything inside of it was night gowns. I almost gave up, when I ran to the 'memory room'. If there was one thing I still kept with me, were several suits of cloths. Every-day clothes.  
  
"Looking good!"  
  
I looked GOOOOOD! I forgot how comfortable showing my belly-button was. And wearing tights! AHHH! Now, about my hair... Glancing over at Venus's drawers, I noticed an adorable purple ribbon. This would be perfect. I got on to rearranging my hair. Diggin' through my drawers, I took out a pair of red sunglasses and then left the room. I most have looked really different.  
  
"STOP! THIEF!"  
  
Looking to my side, I spotted Uranus and Neptune running at my direction.  
  
'They must not recognize me!'  
  
I ran the other way, only to find Jupiter and Venus.  
  
"Hey, who're you?"  
  
"She has my ribbon! The one that belonged to my sister!"  
  
"GET HER!"  
  
Knowing that Neptune and Uranus were behind me, I waited. Soon enough, I got away. Uranus and Jupiter tried charging at me at the same time. BIG mistake. Ok, so maybe going through the main doors was a bad idea. Sue me, I'm new at this.  
  
  
  
Learning from my mistakes, I used side doors and servant exists. I finally made it to the kitchen and got out. Finally, I was out of the palace.  
  
'Where to go now?'  
  
I let my feet carry me wherever they wanted. It was so much fun! No one knew who I was, yet because I was naturally better-looking than most, I still got plenty of attention. I checked in my pockets. I had my credit card. Looking at the name on the card, I couldn't help but smile. In fact, I was grinning. 'Hino Rei. 50,000 limit'. And get this straight- it's a Crystal credit card. And when most things cost around the 200 credits TOPS, I can buy pretty much the entire city if I wanted to! One of the first things we got after the rebirth. So that we could live our lives without a care. WHAT A JOKE!  
  
  
  
I came to a stop as I realized where I was. One of the Crystal Points, one of the pillars of Crystal Tokyo- the Hikawa Jinja Shinto Temple.  
  
'Ojii-San...'  
  
I must have looked odd. Such a fine girl, standing, staring at the old structure.  
  
'I'm here. Might as well have a look see.'  
  
And quite a look it was, indeed! The temple was practically EXPLODING with visitors. And policemen. And reporters. I got closer, hoping to get a better hear.  
  
"Mr. Hino, how do you feel about your Daughter's disappearance 10 years ago?"  
  
"Mr. Hino, how do you feel about your GRANDaughter's disappearance ten years ago?"  
  
From those two questions, I knew that my father was there as well. I thought I'd better walk away, when a hand grabbed me and pulled me into the temple. I didn't lose my cool. After all, I was born for this kind of thing.  
  
"HIYA!"  
  
I shouted, sending my attacker at the nearest wall. Realizing too late my mistake.  
  
"YUUICHIRU-KUN!"  
  
I ran to him and helped him up.  
  
'What a fool he must think of me now.'  
  
"I'm so sorry, Yuuichiru-Kun. I... I didn't mean to... You came so suddenly and..."  
  
Before I could keep on blabbering, he laid a kiss. Straight on the lips.  
  
"I missed you, Rei-Chan. Where were you?"  
  
Rei-Chan... Rei-Chan...  
  
"Oh, Yuuichiru-Kun... I..."  
  
Hearing my name triggered an emotional baggage I though I didn't have. I started crying, allowing myself to drown in his embrace.  
  
"It's all right, Rei-Chan. It's all right. Shhh. I'm here."  
  
Obviously coming 'cause of the commotion I made by throwing Yuuichiru across the room, Ojii-San and Otou-San came in running, expecting the worst.  
  
"Yuuichiru-Kun, are you... All... right?!"  
  
I looked up from Yuuichiru's now-wet-with-tears shoulder and met Ojii-San's gaze.  
  
"Hello, Ojii-San. Otou-San. Good to see you again."  
  
I didn't mean to, but my smile turned out sad and... Well, tired. My father stood, frozen. He obviously wanted to keep up the charade of caring about his missing daughter and get more people to vote for him. Even though I had more influence than he ever had, he still wanted it. Thank god no one knew I was Sailor Mars. My father never would've let me out of his sight.  
  
But Ojii-San... Good old Ojii-San.  
  
"Rei-Chan... My sweet little Rei-Chan."  
  
By now he was crying as well. I opened my arms invitingly and he accepted. Yuuichiru half hugging me, my Ojii-San hugging me completely, even Otou-San just being there...  
  
That morning was the best in a long while. I was there, with the people I cared for most in the world. And cared for me back. My Ojii-San kept asking me where I was. All he needed to hear was that I was serving the cause to which I was born. It wasn't that he didn't believe me. It was just that after my... My mother's death, he claimed Otou-San stopped her from reaching her goal. Hearing me say I reached mine made him so happy...  
  
And then there was Yuuichiru-Kun. I never quite saw how much he cared for me. I mean, I HAVE, it's just that... I missed it. No one in the palace treated any of the senshi like that. Other than Moon, but she's no longer a senshi.  
  
The look in his eyes when he's looking at me, the smile on his face. God, Yuuichiru doesn't LOVE me, he's IN-LOVE with me! I can't believe I never saw it this clearly before! God help me, I... I fell for him as well.  
  
That morning, surrounded by my family and the man who turned out to be my love. That morning I reached a decision. Sailor Mars is dead. May she rest in peace. Long live Hino Rei.  
  
  
  
To Be Continued! ^-^ 


	2. Day

*looks at list of stuff she owns after Sylphimon action figure and this fic* nope. Still don't own Sailor Moon. Wanna trade? It's a good action figure ^_^  
  
Life after senshi-hood.  
  
Day  
  
I looked at the clock on the wall. It showed 12. 12 more hours.  
  
'12 more hours before I hang the normal clothes and go back to being Sailor Mars, burning champion of love and justice.'  
  
I most have been crying, since Yuuichiru wiped some tears from my cheeks.  
  
"So, Rei-Chan..."  
  
I like hearing it. I NEED to hear it more. Rei-Chan... Has a nice ring to it, don't you think?  
  
"...Have any plans for tonight?"  
  
I 'strained' my brain. Do I wanna return to the palace early and make a sort of fool out of myself after begging to stay late, or spend an evening with the man I care for?  
  
"No, but I suppose YOU do."  
  
He laughed a bit and embraced me. I welcomed it.  
  
"How about you and I go to this little club my family owns? You could catch me play with my band. We play all through the night."  
  
Oh uh.  
  
"Yuuichiru-Kun, I..."  
  
"Please, Rei-Chan? PLEASE?! It'd mean the world to me, and this is why I even came to the temple in the first place! You seeing me perform would mean everything for me and would mean I won. Please, Rei-Chan? For me?"  
  
I'm gonna regret this. Right?  
  
"One condition. Ojii-San comes too."  
  
Yuuichiru laughed at that.  
  
"What's so funny?!"  
  
I said, hitting his arm lightly.  
  
"Ojii-San practically LIVES there after dark! Sure, he gets a bit drunk, but that's only to..."  
  
He paused and I begged him with a look to continue.  
  
"...Only to ease the pain of losing you 10 years ago."  
  
I hugged him tightly and went to my Ojii-San.  
  
"Oh, Ojii-San, I'm so sorry. I never though... I mean, I did, but... I couldn't come and be there for you. I'm so utterly ashamed of my self. Gomen. Gomen nasai."  
  
"Oh, Rei-Chan. It's all right. I'm just happy to see you here again, safe and sound."  
  
I took time to examine my Ojii-San as he went to sweep the floor. Crystal health treatments working their charms, he was probably in a better condition than me, what with me doing practically nothing at the palace. He was well built, for any age, and that childish smile in his eyes was there. Something that wasn't when I looked at him during that press conference, no doubt arranged by my father.  
  
"Re, Rei-Chan. Konnichiwa."  
  
I turned around to face my father.  
  
"Otou-San."  
  
He looked like he was about to say something, but I hugged him. I didn't want to start a fight. Not now, not with him.  
  
"I missed you, daddy."  
  
I was thrilled when he hugged back. My Otou-San was never the type to hug back. And there weren't even reporters around to tell the world how caring he is!  
  
"I missed you too, Rei-Chan. Why'd you do something like that? If you wanted attention, all you had to do was ask."  
  
"Oh, daddy, it never worked. Only... Only with mom."  
  
He hugged me tighter, and for the first time in maybe my life, I learned that my pain for my mother was greater than I thought. As well as was the comfort by my father.  
  
"It will now, sweetie. 10 years without you can change anyone, even me."  
  
We stayed like that for several more minutes, breaking apart slowly. He wiped his tears quickly, but I already saw they were there. Oh, Otou-San...  
  
"Say, you wanna go shopping?"  
  
"HUH?!"  
  
"Don't get me wrong, Rei-Chan, you're a knock-out in that outfit, but wouldn't you say it's a bit... OLD?"  
  
Putting it mildly, aren't you dad?  
  
"Sure thing. And then maybe I'll buy you coffee and a pie."  
  
"Sure sweetheart, that'd be grand, and... Did you say YOU'll buy ME coffee?"  
  
"-giggle- just give me that car keys, dad, and give me directions. Tokyo has changed since the last time I drove around it."  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
Serenity sat on her throne, her gaze sat on the window.  
  
'Have I done the right thing? If it was anyone else, would I let them go?'  
  
"Mamma?"  
  
"Small Lady! Come in, come in!"  
  
Chibiusa closed the door lightly behind her and ran to sit by her mother.  
  
"Where's Sailor Mars, mamma? I looked all over the palace for her."  
  
"I... She's... That is..."  
  
'I can't possibly tell her!'  
  
"She's on a mission, Small Lady."  
  
"Oh. Ok. Bye mamma!"  
  
The little girl ran out the door and giggled.  
  
'On a mission... But will she return?'  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
I was still laughing when I dropped all the clothes I bought on the floor of my old room and let myself fall on the bed. On the ceiling was my old poster of Megumi Hayashibara. My once idol winked back, like she has since I bought the poster. In her honor, I started singing.  
  
"Oh, Starry Night... How will I know, will his love show, is he my one true loooooooove..." (A/N- told you it'll be a mix ^.~)  
  
Clapping woke me up. Yuuichiru was at the door, clapping.  
  
"Think you could sing like that tonight?"  
  
I was caught off guard. Something that seemed to happen ALOT that day.  
  
"Maybe. If you'll get out and allow me to get dressed!"  
  
I threw a pillow at him and his laughter escorted me all the way through the afternoon.  
  
  
  
I was about to hit the shower, when two black birds sat on my window. My tired sad smile returned.  
  
"Hello, Phoboes. Daimos."  
  
The two flew towards my bed, and landed as their little humanoid selves.  
  
"Princess, we thought... We FEARED that..."  
  
I picked them up and hugged them gently as a five year old would her dolls.  
  
"I'm here. I'm ok. And I'm glad to see you two again. It's been a while."  
  
The two of them then went on about how Yuuichiru and Ojii-San were crushed that I wasn't there after the rebirth. How worried they themselves were. And how... How Ojii-San stopped visiting my mother.  
  
"OJII-SAN!"  
  
I stormed down the stairs, almost knocking Yuuichiru out.  
  
"Gomen, Yuuichiru-Kun. OJII-SAN, WHY ON EARTH HAVE YOU STOPPED VISITING OKAA-SAN?!"  
  
He was caught a bit off guard and I could see the subject caused him pain. However, I was not going to back down from this.  
  
"Yuuichiru-Kun, could you..."  
  
Without another word from my Ojii-San, Yuuichiru left and within moments was outside, sweeping the floor.  
  
"Then why? What made you stop visiting her?!"  
  
He sighed, collecting himself.  
  
"I visited her during the first three years of your... ABSENCE. The first year, I was full of rage, and prayed for her to guard you, look after you. The second, I was hopeless. I prayed hard, and wished for you to be found. The third year, I came to the graveyard, and turned back even before I made it to her grave."  
  
I was about to ask why, but he beat me to it.  
  
"I was ashamed, Rei-Chan. Ashamed and full of self-hate. I couldn't face the tombstone, you know, where we put her picture. You two look too much a like. I couldn't face the family plot, from fear you might be there. And I couldn't face Misako-Chan's memory, knowing I failed her so much. Failed to guard her only child once the world got another chance at life."  
  
We were both crying by the time he finished, and I knew what I had to do. Time to pay my mother a visit.  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
"Your highness? May I trouble you with something?"  
  
Sailor Venus asked as she entered the throne room.  
  
"Yes, Venus. Come in."  
  
Venus walked in and bowed. The queen immediately noticed something was wrong.  
  
"Rise. What can I do for you?"  
  
Venus sighed and told the queen everything, about how they spotted the thief earlier, to how worried she got when she noticed Mars was missing.  
  
"What's happening, your highness?"  
  
'I better talk to Mars about stealing the ribbon.'  
  
"Nothing, Venus. The thief has been caught and you'll have your sister's ribbon back by tomorrow."  
  
"And Mars?"  
  
Venus wasn't afraid to show her concern for Mars. Although was it for a friend, or beyond, she didn't know.  
  
After a long pause, the queen answered.  
  
"Sailor Mars is... On a mission. Of the highest importance."  
  
"And none of the senshi know about this because...?"  
  
"The mission is quite dangerous. Mars did not want to upset you by telling you where she was going and why."  
  
That wasn't the whole truth, nor was it a lie. As far as Neo-Queen Serenity was concerned, anywhere out of her sight was a dangerous place for her senshi. And if she told the other senshi where Mars was, they would start a commotion. Serenity couldn't afford that.  
  
Venus could sense the queen was hiding something. After all, she has known her ever since they became senshi together, and although she knew her queen a bit less better than Mars or Mercury, she was still closer to her than most sailors. However, she chose not to say anything.  
  
"With your permission, your majesty."  
  
Bowing again, Venus left the throne room. Closing the door, she leaned against it and allowed several tears to fall.  
  
'Mars... Rei-Chan, where ARE you?!'  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
'Hello, mother.'  
  
I kneeled next to the grey tombstone, allowing dirt on my suit. The picture of hers that was on the tombstone was covered in dust, so I cleared it off. I was the spitting image of my mother. And I was damn proud of it.  
  
'It's been a while, ne, Okaa-San? So long since I was able to walk freely wherever I chose, whenever I chose it. And most of all, to come and visit you. Mina-Chan once asked me who I think got off lighter, me or Mako-Chan. Mako-Chan losing both parents, me only losing one. I told her I envy Mako- Chan. Don't get me wrong, I love Ojii-San with all my heart, and I'd never have met Yuuichiru-Kun outside of the temple, but... Its worse, having the parent that IS alive ignore you and abandon you. I started crying, and we never touched the subject again. I...  
  
I missed you, Okaa-San. All those years, I kept sane, knowing you were there, watching over me. Keeping me safe. It's for you that I fought. It's for you that I brought forth this paradise. If only you were alive, maybe... Not maybe, SURELY a cure was to be found! But you're not... And the hospital I founded at your honor saved lives. I know that's what you wanted.'  
  
I stayed there for a while longer, feeling the guards getting edgy. Making sure they weren't looking, I relit some of the candles that were next to Okaa-San's grave. I was just about to leave, when a voice kept me there.  
  
"It IS what I want, Rei-Chan. It IS."  
  
I turned around, and it was like looking into a mirror.  
  
"Okaa-San..."  
  
  
  
I stood there for a while, just staring at my dead mother's spirit.  
  
"It's good to see you, Rei-Chan. My, how you've grown!"  
  
"Arigatou, Okaa-San. It's good to see you too."  
  
"I can see this is a bit awkward for you, Rei-Chan, so I'll be quick about this. Are you happy?"  
  
"Wha..."  
  
"Are you happy? Not was, not going to be, but now. At this moment, with your daily freedom."  
  
"Of course. It's what I wished for for months!"  
  
Hino Misako (A/N- I'm pretty sure that's her real name ^^) laughed a relieved laugh. I stood there, more than a bit confused.  
  
"I was afraid you'll say no. I was afraid you'll want back to the palace."  
  
"Why would I want THAT?!"  
  
"Rei-Chan, listen to me. I know of things to come. The senshi... The senshi are disappearing. They... They have lost themselves. No matter what they claim, they're not the same."  
  
"I... I know, Kaa-San. That's why I just HAD to get away from there!"  
  
Kaa-San hugged me and I hugged back with all my might.  
  
"Promise me you'll make the right choices, Rei-Chan."  
  
"I promise, Kaa-San. I won't fail you!"  
  
She kissed my forehead, and suddenly the conversation's content was erased from my memory. I guess I wasn't allowed to remember what she said.  
  
'I won't fail you, Kaa-San. I won't.'  
  
  
  
I returned to the Hikawa Jinja temple and took a long bath. Phobeos and Daimos were there, listening to me bickering. They were so happy to have me back, and I sure missed them. After the bath I changed into a long red gown, one that Otou-San and I bought earlier. I kept checking myself over and over again, when Yuuichiru came in.  
  
"Rei-Chan... You look absolutely stunning! I'm almost afraid to take you outside!"  
  
I blushed at his praise and allowed him to lead me to the car. But before that, I had to make another promise.  
  
"Rei-Chan, something tells me that... That this is our only night together."  
  
I looked down. I was afraid of the truth.  
  
"So I want you to promise to me that it'll be the very best we could have."  
  
"I promise, Yuuichiru-Kun. I want this just as much as you do."  
  
He kissed my forehead and let me in the car.  
  
"Where to, sir?"  
  
My Ojii-San was sitting in the driver's seat, pretending to be our private driver.  
  
"You know where, Hino-San."  
  
"Right. One Kamada club, coming right up."  
  
We began driving, and I asked Yuuichiru everything I could think about concerning his band.  
  
"Well, Rei-Chan. I guess we'll just have to wait and see."  
  
I nodded and looked at the watch. 9:00 PM. 3 hours. I can take it. 3 more hours with my loved ones. Only 3 more hours. I can take it. Right? 


	3. Evening

Bishoju Senshi Sailor Moon is mine! Bwahaha! :D too bad Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon is still Naoko's v_v  
  
Life after senshi-hood.  
  
Evening.  
  
I was in heaven. I let my voice come out of me, bringing out everything that was kept hidden over the past 10 years. The sorrow, the pain, the loneliness... The love, the passion, the... Well, the fire.  
  
And the crowd loved me. They cheered, and singed along to some of the more familiar songs I sang... And called for me when I tried going off stage. But I went off anyways. Yuuichiru and Ojii-San were waiting for me by the bar.  
  
"That was... Wow. Rei-Chan, that was a definite wow."  
  
"Definite."  
  
Ojii-San replied from behind the bar.  
  
"So what can I get you?"  
  
He asked, and got two glasses ready. He must've been doing this for a while now. He looked so professional.  
  
"the usual for me, Hino-San, and..."  
  
Yuuichiru looked at me and I couldn't help but blush. Eventually, he sighed and showed signs of defeat.  
  
"Told you I'll find a woman I can't read what's her drink!"  
  
They shared a laugh and I shrugged it off as a private joke I didn't WANT to know about.  
  
"I'll have some coke, thank. Er..."  
  
I caught myself, but Ojii-San didn't mind.  
  
"Two Crystal-Cola, coming right up."  
  
I tried to suppress a giggle as he blushed. The great 'usual' was just plain old Crystal Cola. My days' coke was stronger than that!  
  
"So... Any more performances on for tonight or you'll call the DJ on early?"  
  
"I was thinking more in the lines of... thetwoofusesingingtogetheronstage..."  
  
He blushed and turned away. However...  
  
"Give up, Yuuichiru-Kun. I heard it."  
  
He stared at me.  
  
"You understood?!"  
  
"Yeah. After years with Usa-Chan, there isn't a mumble I couldn't understand!"  
  
"So, Usagi-Chan was with you?! That's great! Her family was going insane, almost like us! They came over almost everyday during the first three years, asking about her! You know where she is?!"  
  
I blushed at my mistake. How could I let Yuuichiru know about me being with Usa-Chan and the others?! Luckily for me, however, Ojii-San came right then with our drinks. I took mine and tried to drink it with as small sips as I could.  
  
"Don't harass her, Yuuichiru-Kun! If I were you, I'd be talking to her about other things."  
  
I put the glass down and looked at them, confused.  
  
"What other things?"  
  
"Oh, you know, Rei-Chan. Other-THINGS..."  
  
I could swear Yuuichiru blushed even harder. I giggled again and went back to stage. The crowd cheered. I drank it like I would water after spending time in the desert. Not the actual applause, mind you. But the fact that there were strangers out there.  
  
'They really love me!'  
  
The next few songs I sang were softer. They were mainly soft love ballads, telling of lost loves, found loves, and... Forbidden loves. I felt like a princess, seeing her kingdom for the first time in her lifetime. And it felt great. But fate has a twisted sense of humor. I was just finishing my last song as the clock sounded its voice. It was 11 o'clock. An hour before my time here was up.  
  
'No...'  
  
I got off of stage and approached Yuuichiru.  
  
"Yuuichiru-Kun, I think it's best we leave."  
  
He looked at me, a bit disappointed.  
  
"But, the party's just about to begin and..."  
  
I held his hand gently and tried putting on the puppy-face I remembered Usa- Chan using so well so often.  
  
"Please? We... We need to talk."  
  
"What about?"  
  
"You know. STUFF."  
  
I hoped he'd think I know what Ojii-San and he talked about. He did.  
  
"Ojii-San, you'll get yourself home?"  
  
"Ya. You kids go out and have fun."  
  
Before we left, Ojii-San grabbed my hand and whispered to me.  
  
"It was good to see you again, Rei-Chan. If only for today."  
  
I looked at him, tears threatening my eyes. I gave him a quick peck on the cheek and left, unable to look back. However, my heart willed, and I looked back for an instant, enough to see him turn back to the sad old man I saw that morning when I first arrived at the temple. Gomen nasai, Ojii-San. Gomen.  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
Venus leaned against the window and sighed deeply. She has looked for Mars the entire day, and found nothing. What worse, the Queen would answer none of her questions.  
  
'Where are you, Mars? What are you doing?'  
  
She looked up. It was that time when Mars and Venus were almost in alignment.  
  
'Mars looks so shiny, so... ALIVE. Mars, could this mean... You're happy?'  
  
Venus prayed so. But a part of her still wanted it to be false. She DID want Mars to be happy, just... She wanted for Mars to be happy with her.  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
"Here we are. Isn't the view something to die for, Rei-Chan?"  
  
I looked around me. We were on one of the tallest buildings in Crystal Tokyo, and let me tell you- the Crystal Palace sure looks amazing at nighttime. Ain't no other way to describe it.  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
"If only you'd've known the irony of it all, Yuuichiru-Kun..."  
  
"But you'll always be my favorite staring object."  
  
I blushed.  
  
"I suppose you didn't bring me up here to stare."  
  
"YOU were the one who wanted to leave!"  
  
"I just wanted some time with you... Alone."  
  
I leaned against him, my hair messed up against his warm chest. We sat back, and my head rose and fell with each breath he took. I heard his heart beat, and noticed it suddenly started speeding. Guessing my Yuuichiru-Kun wasn't going to have a heart attack on my one day out, I looked up at him, my gaze pleading him to tell me what's on his mind. He gently freed himself from our contact, although it was obvious he was coursing himself for doing so. He reached into his pocket, and took out a small velvet covered box. I gasped as I understood what might be in it.  
  
"Rei-Chan, I... I was going to give this to you. But then you disappeared, 10 years ago. I wanted us to have a peaceful life. With my family's money, neither of us ever should've worked for a day, and... But that's done and over with. I guess, what I'm saying is..."  
  
He opened the box. The small ruby gemstone glittered brilliantly in the moonlight. Small dragons held it to the ring at the base of the gem.  
  
"Yuuichiru-Kun... Oh, Yuuichiru-Kun, I... I don't know what to say!"  
  
"Say you'll marry me, Rei-Chan. Tell me I won't have to wake up another morning and wonder where you are. Tell me I won't have anymore sleepless nights, where nightmares would haunt me. Nightmares where... Where you..."  
  
He shook off the memories and looked at me pleadingly. I felt like my heart smashed into a billion little pieces. Why, god why?  
  
"Yuuichiru-Kun, I..."  
  
I looked at the city again. The palace sent me looking at my watch. 23:55.  
  
"Oh. My. God."  
  
"Rei-Chan? What's wrong? Rei-Chan? Where are you going?! Rei-Chan!"  
  
It tore my heart, to leave him there yelling after me. But what choice did I have?  
  
He ran after me. I knew he would. I turned back and shot a fireball at the ground in front of him.  
  
"Don't follow me, Yuuichiru-Kun. I beg of you."  
  
My face was a mess. Tears kept streaming out of my eyes, and I couldn't care less that my nose was leaking as well (A/N- eww, I know, but it fits!).  
  
"goodbye, Yuuichiru-Kun. I wish we had more time, but... Fate is the most beautiful thing ever, Yuuichiru-Kun. It brings people together, even for 5 magical minutes. We'll always have each other. Aishiteru, Yuuichiru-Kun. Never forget me. Ja Ne!"  
  
I said, running towards the palace. 23:57. I'm not gonna make it. Unless...  
  
"Mars Crystal Power!"  
  
It was the first time in 10 years that phrase has escaped my leaps. Seeing a Sailor Senshi running through the streets sure brought forth the desired affect. People cleared a path for me. That, and my heightened speed, allowed me to make it. Almost.  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
"Your Highness, we should close the gates. It's late, and..."  
  
"You shall keep the gates open for as long as I tell you so, general."  
  
"Yes, your Highness."  
  
The general looked outside the gates, waiting... But for what, none of the staff knew.  
  
"She's not gonna make it."  
  
Endymion said, putting a hand on Serenity's shoulder.  
  
"She will. She has to."  
  
Serenity looked outside the gates, and sighed as the clock rang its first out of twelve rings.  
  
"Very well. We'll look for her in the morning. General, you may close the gates."  
  
"Yes Ma'am! You heard your Queen! Do it!"  
  
'Mars... Why must you betray my faith like this?'  
  
"WAIT"  
  
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~  
  
The gates are closing. I'm too late!  
  
"WAIT!"  
  
I yelled with all my might and ran like I never had before. The gate continued on closing. With one desperate leap, I crossed the gate and watched it slam shut behind me.  
  
"What the..."  
  
"Mars!"  
  
Some of the guards rushed to my side and helped me up. Serenity and Endymion welcomed me, Serenity wearing a smiled I have almost forgotten about. A smile warmer than the one she had that morning.  
  
"I'm glad to see you have returned to us, Mars."  
  
"With all due respect, 'your highness', what were you expecting? That one of your Senshi would become a fugitive?"  
  
The guards gasped at my obvious disrespect for the Queen, but she laughed softly.  
  
"I knew you wouldn't fail me. Go and rest. We'll talk about your 'mission' in the morning."  
  
She turned to leave, but I wasn't going to let her.  
  
"Oh now, Your Majesty. We're gonna have a nice little chat, right here, right now."  
  
She looked at me, skeptical.  
  
"Very well. What about?"  
  
"I'm tired of this. This whole act. I'm tired of being someone I'm not, and tired of forgetting the person I am."  
  
"I don't understand."  
  
No other way to say it, I hugged her. As tight as I would during the years I allowed the fact that I cared for her and about her to be publicly known. However, she pushed me away. As gently and apologetically as only she would. But she still pushed me away.  
  
"Now you understand me?"  
  
She looked shocked as she noticed my tears. And it accord to me then that I haven't stopped crying since I left Yuuichiru.  
  
"I'll be in my room. Good night, Usa-Chan."  
  
I left, the shocked gasps of the guards and Endymion escorting me. All the way to the other three Inner senshi.  
  
"Mars, how dare you, to call the Queen by her given name!"  
  
"Mars, that's too bold, even for you!"  
  
Only Venus showed concern.  
  
"Mars, I was so worried about you! You disappeared, and the Queen wouldn't tell us anything, and... Mars? Are you listening?"  
  
I walked past them. Venus grabbed my arm and turned me to her.  
  
"Mars, what's wrong? You don't look like yourself..."  
  
"On the contrary, MINA-Chan. I haven't been like myself in the last 10 years. MAKO-Chan, AMI-Chan, if you please..."  
  
I pried my hand from Mina's grip and went to my room. How could any of them understand? How? 


	4. Midnight

I don't own Sailor Moon. Wow, feels nice to write it after so long ^^

A/N: so so sorry for not updating for so long! ;_; Hope this will make up for it.

BTW: Venus's POV opens this chapter. It'll be a switch between her and Mars. Hope it won't be too confusing.

**Life after Senshi-hood.******

****

Chapter 4: Midnight.

I hate it. I simply hate it. She's in pain, so much pain, and I can't do a thing about it. At least, not while everyone were still hovering around her room. But now I could finally get some time alone with her. That is, if she'll talk to me.

Come on, hand, knock already!

And of course, come on, Rei-Chan, answer already!

Rei-Chan… Heh. Even thinking that name seems odd after so long. But… I know you're in there. I can hear your quiet sobs. I can see your tears. I can feel your pain. If you'd just let me into your heart… But first, your room --;;

There's a knock on the door. I should answer that. Why should I, on second thought? Not like it'll be anyone I care about. Not like it'll be anyone who cares about me. Of course, it _could_ be Usa-Chan. But the odds are, what… everything to none?

"Mars? Are you in there?"

…

"…"

"Mina-Chan?"

"Rei-Chan… Mars? Answer me please!"

You just had to take it back, didn't you, Minako? You couldn't let me have it.

"What do you want?"

Great, she's hesitating. Way to go…

Her voice… it's angry. About them? About me? About… herself, maybe? I can't blame her. None of us Senshi know what it's like out there. What if… what if it's better? Get a grip, if it was that great, why did she come back?! Then again, why throw such a huge fit if it's that good in here?

"Mars… Rei-Chan… Can I come in? Please?"

"Please?"

I can't let her in. If I do, I'll be letting them all in. In on what? This feeling of non-belongness? This feeling of sadness? This feeling of… of treason? 

Why should I feel it? Because I saw what I once was and long to be once again? Because I met my family? Because… because I met _him_? Or is it because… I suddenly have a choice? The other Senshi don't know what's out there. Heck, the Outers don't WANNA know what's out there. This is their life long dream. Well, not mine! I'm sorry, Usa-chan. I can't take it anymore. Just can't. Please forgive me.

"Mars?! Come on, Rei-Chan, open up!"

Noises… what is she doing in there?! Dear god…

"Rei? REI!"

I don't know why I'm so scared. All I know is that I am. Scared for Rei.

So I slammed against the door.

"Rei! Don't do anything, I'll… Ouf, I'll be right… in? REI-CHAN!"

She's standing there, on the window seal. And I don't think I've ever seen her more beautiful then this.

"Mina-Chan, I…"

Don't cry, Rei-Chan. Please don't. Not now.

"…I love you."

And then, she jumped.

I ran as fast as I can… just in time to see several guards rush over to her, and then turn away in fear. I watch, helpless, as my love's beautiful soul leaves her tired body. Even in death, you are beautiful, Rei-Chan. Like a phoenix. 

May you rest in peace, Sailor Mars. And may Hino Rei forever more live in our hearts.

A/N: well, ended the first chapter like this, felt like ending this chapter like that. Wait for the epilogue! ^.^ which won't be a long wait, since I'm gonna write it right away! ^_^


	5. A new dawn

I don't own Sailor Moon. Though I've lately bought a Mixx Issue of it ^.^

A/N: the original version was much longer, but… Well, there's a reason I'm posting this version x.x that other version $ucked.

**Life after Senshi-hood**

****

A new Dawn

It was a beautiful spring day. However, it did not lift the Senshi of Love's mood. How long has it been now? 15 years? Yes, that's the time she's been alone. The time she had had to try and heal. The time she spent without the Senshi of war.

'Ironic, isn't it? The Senshi of love fell in love with the Senshi of war. Irony at its best.'

To a side viewer, it would appear that the woman once known as Aino Minako was looking over the city she helped rebuild. But in reality, she was gazing at a single spot in the courtyard. There was still a phoenix shaped burn mark where her once friend, and wished for lover ended her life the same way she lived them. With a dazzling flame and pashion.

"I'm worried, Mercury."

The brown haired Senshi of protection said in a low voice.

"I know you are, Jupiter. But maybe she's just not ready to move on…"

The gloved fist slammed against the wall, causing the shorter Senshi to jump in surprise.

"Darn it, Mercury! It's been 15 years now! With all due respect…"

"With all due respect, Jupiter, I'd like to think that if something happened to me you'd mourn me even longer than that!"

Jupiter bit her lip, then embraced Mercury with an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry. It's just… it hurts me to see her like that, Mercury. She's our friend…"

"And as such, we have to respect her decision. Look, she eats regularly. She does her job, I hate to say it, but maybe even better than before! So she became a sort of loner. We never said anything about it to Pluto or Saturn."

"They had each other, Uranus, Neptune and Small Lady. Venus…"

"Is dealing with it in her own way. I'm sure that when the time is right, she'll open up to us."

Jupiter nodded reluctantly, and sighed.

"Excuse me…"

Both Senshi turned around to the soft voice of the maid and their eyes widened.

"I'm looking for Sailor Venus, have you, seen, her… Are you all right?"

The maid asked at the surprised looks on the faces of the two Sailors.

"Oh, never mind, there she is. Good day, my ladies."

The maid walked past them, her long brown hair waving behind her.

"I think you should check my eyesight, Mercury."  
"I think I'll check mine first."

"My lady Venus?"

"Hm?"

Venus turned her expressionless face towards the maid, granting her pretty much the same reaction Mercury and Jupiter had.

"My lady, are you all right?"

Venus was barely able to nod her head.

"Wha, what is it?"

The maid gracefully presented Venus with a file folder and bowed.

"Her majesty wishes for you to review this and give her your opinion. She said it was quite urgent."

She said, and looked outside the window at the gate. Venus followed her gaze and managed a smile.

"Someone's waiting for you?"

The maid was caught by surprise, but nodded politely.

"What's your name, sweetheart?"

Venus asked softly, her smile becoming somewhat realer.

"Huh? Oh, Kamada Usagi, my lady."

Venus's eyes narrowed and her smile got a naughty quality to it.

"Usagi. That's a nice name. And… Kamada?"

"Hai."

"I'm sorry, you're in a hurry. You're excused."

"Thank you, my lady."

With a final bow, the maid was about to leave.

"Oh, and one last thing, Usagi."

"My lady?"

Venus's eyes scouted the area outside the gate before she spoke.

"Tell your mother I said hi."

Usagi nodded slowly and rushed off. Soon Venus saw her running past the courtyard and meet with a woman. They discussed about something for a while, then the older woman's eyes widened and almost automatically searched the windows of the castle. Until they landed on the first floor window where Venus had been. 

The tension was almost too much for Venus to bear, when a soft chuckle rang through her head.

'Let's have tea together, Mina-Chan.'

Venus's smile turned into a grin.

'Let's, Rei-Chan. And then you could tell me all about your lovely husband and children.'

Mother and daughter leaving the courtyard, Venus could hardly contain herself. To others appearing mad, Venus had began to laugh off 15 long years of pain.

From the side, Mercury and Jupiter blinked, looked at each other, blinked, then grinned themselves.

"Let's skip that sight check."

"Let's."

Three relieved laughters rang through the castle's halls, echoing in Neo Queen's Serenity's smile.

For it is a Phoenix's fate to rise again from the ashes.

And all was well.


End file.
